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Menampilkan postingan dari November, 2017

50 Ways To Kill Your Fish: Crowded Tank

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If you post an online picture of a beautiful hobbyist-owned aquarium packed full of fish, you'll probably get several reactions: OMG, that is the coolest thing I've ever seen! (^▽^) OMG, that is the cruelest thing I've ever seen! ((╬◣﹏◢)) OMG, how did they accomplish that? I must know! ლ(ಠ_ಠ ლ) That's because there are sooo many differing opinions on how many fish in a tank is too many. Asking "How many fish can I keep in my aquarium?" is like asking "How many cats can I keep in my house?" – it totally depends on each person's preferences and lifestyle. Clearly, five cats is not enough. You need at least six in a school or else they start getting nippy. Huge props to the Real Fish Talk: How Much Is Too Much? video for breaking it down like this: The more fish you have, The more food they eat, The more waste they create, The more work you have to do to keep the tank clean. In other words, more fish = more time you'll have to in...

How To Make Friends As An Adult, Part 4: The Tale Of Four Friends

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All this time, I've proclaimed the wonders of the Friendship Funnel and how great the method has worked for meeting people and making new friends . Today's where the rubber meets the road. Let me tell you about four different friendships in my life and what it really looks like to put these relationship tools into practice. 3 Decades and Counting Technically I met my best friend at age three, so this counts more as a childhood friendship. However, in adulthood we went to colleges 800+ miles apart, started our first professional jobs in the same city, and then split up once more a couple of years after getting married. And most likely, I'll never live in the same state as her again. So why is she still my BFF to this day? I can't remember who started it, but in college we decided to become accountability partners in our walks with Christ. Ever since then, we've maintained a weekly call, hangout, or video chat to ask how the other is doing and pray for one ...

How To Make Friends As An Adult, Part 3: How To Turn An Acquaintance Into A Friend Worth Keeping

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In this series so far, we've talked about the Friendship Funnel and how to make friends by meeting, filtering, and investing in people. Part 2 focused on where and how to meet potential friends. Part 3 explores what it means to filter and invest in people. These two steps go hand in hand because in order to determine if someone is a friend worth keeping, you need to invest time to really get to know him or her. Spend Time Together If you've met an individual several times in group settings and your personalities seem to click, now it's time to test the waters and find out what kind of friend she is. For me, that involves hanging out on a one-to-one basis. Conversations tend to deepen once you get past the small talk and you find out what the other person actually thinks about his boss, spouse, and even political and religious views. Take the Initiative You need to make the first step, not wait on the other person. People get busy with life and may not make fri...

How To Make Friends As An Adult, Part 2: Where To Meet Potential Friends

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Last week I introduced the Friendship Funnel and how you need to continually meet, filter, and invest in people to make new friends. In this article, let's focus on the "meet" part of the equation – how do you intentionally encounter new groups of people? Top 4 Places for Finding Friends There are a ton of situations and gatherings where you can meet new people, but the groups where I've had the most success had these things in common: An area of interest for you Regularly occurring meetings that happen at least once a month (or are supplemented with active social media channels, chatrooms, or forums) Growing membership with both new and longtime participants Here are a few examples of where I have personally found and made friends despite not knowing anyone: Church Churches encourage fellowship, community, and love for your fellow man, so usually members have a culture of being very open to making new friends. (If not, try another church.) Upon find...