Info AquaScape

So... basically I’ve been accused of being a robot sometimes. Like, by my own husband, my mother, my brother... It’s because I think my emotion chip got short-circuited when God made me and I ended up with the empathy level of a rock. Because of this personality trait of mine, one of my “areas of improvement” in our marriage is having a better bedside manner when my husband gets a man cold, uh I mean, is legitimately sick. He grew up with a nurse for a mom, so she’s, like, the ultimate loving, caring mother and I’m definitely not built like that. So this is what happens when Mr. Gamer is feeling under the weather. I say (in a robotic voice): What’s wrong? Do you require medication? Let me get you said medication. Is there anything else you need? Boom, duduk masalah solved! I mean, from my standpoint, he’s a grown adult, he knows how bad he feels, and he can call the doctor if he needs immediate medical attention, right? On the flip side, when I’m sick, I do the follo...

I've always been super conflict adverse as a kid and now an adult, carefully avoiding saying anything controversial to keep the peace. After all, doesn't the Bible say, "If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all." ( Romans 12:18 )? While that verse is certainly truth, I now know my heart has always been in the wrong place, had the wrong motivation. In reality, I have an unhealthy fear of man, instead of an appropriate fear of God. Being good at school will make me feel loved and respected, right? As a child, I was always the good little girl, eager to win my parents' and teachers' praise. If I did everything right, I was worthy, valuable, special, loved . In middle school, my natural introversion made it hard for me to make friends, which seeded great doubts and insecurities into my heart. As the song goes, "Nobody likes me, Everybody hates me, Guess I'll go eat worms." While I was fortunate to have a close-knit ...

So the other day, my husband Mr. Gamer asked me if I thought he was overweight. Eeee, what do you say that?! Do you go with brutal honesty, white lies, or somewhere in between? I think this brings up a really good question: what do you do if your spouse is overweight and may or may not want to do something about it? So I decided to ask Mr. Gamer, who graciously offered to share his thoughts. In part 1 of the interview, we talked about what to say in a marriage if one spouse tells the other that they’re concerned about an unhealthy weight gain. Key topics included: What if you’re not attracted to your partner anymore? Do you bring it up? There are plenty of things to love about your spouse besides physical appearance, so choose your battles carefully. Honesty is the best policy, but do so with extreme kindness and sensitivity. What if your partner says they’re not attracted to you anymore? How do you take it? If you're receiving the feedback, evaluate whether or not you ...

What do you do if your significant other has hobbies that you’re completely not interested in? For example, my husband enjoys gaming while I like keeping aquarium fish and making videos. The short answer is be respectful and courteous to each other! In this video, I’ll be talking about 4 ways you and your partner can support and encourage each other’s passions and interests, without necessarily joining them. 😉 P.S. This content is aimed at people who have a healthy passion for their hobbies, not a masalah or addiction. Please consult a licensed counselor, psychologist, etc. to seek professional help if needed. Related Links What to Do When Hobbies Steal Your Spouse Three Ways to Keep Your Hobbies and Your Marriage 5 Things You Can do When Hobbies Threaten to Overtake Your Marriage DISCLAIMER: Consult a licensed psychologist, therapist, counselor, etc. for professional treatment concerning life issues and mental health problems. The information shared here is general advic...

Thinking of marrying a gamer? Here are 5 surprising things I didn’t find out about my geeky husband until after we got hitched. (To be fair, we didn’t date for very long. 🤭) Bottom line: I totally dig being married to a gamer and all the spicy variety it brings to my life. With his love of games and my love of aquarium fish, we’re just two different kinds of geeks at heart! Question of the Day What things surprised you about dating or marrying a gamer? Comment below to share your experiences! Subscribe to my YouTube Channel for weekly videos on my secret life as a gamer's wife and tutorials on lazy fish keeping! 🎮👨🏻‍❤️‍👩🐟

All this time, I've proclaimed the wonders of the Friendship Funnel and how great the method has worked for meeting people and making new friends . Today's where the rubber meets the road. Let me tell you about four different friendships in my life and what it really looks like to put these relationship tools into practice. 3 Decades and Counting Technically I met my best friend at age three, so this counts more as a childhood friendship. However, in adulthood we went to colleges 800+ miles apart, started our first professional jobs in the same city, and then split up once more a couple of years after getting married. And most likely, I'll never live in the same state as her again. So why is she still my BFF to this day? I can't remember who started it, but in college we decided to become accountability partners in our walks with Christ. Ever since then, we've maintained a weekly call, hangout, or video chat to ask how the other is doing and pray for one ...

In this series so far, we've talked about the Friendship Funnel and how to make friends by meeting, filtering, and investing in people. Part 2 focused on where and how to meet potential friends. Part 3 explores what it means to filter and invest in people. These two steps go hand in hand because in order to determine if someone is a friend worth keeping, you need to invest time to really get to know him or her. Spend Time Together If you've met an individual several times in group settings and your personalities seem to click, now it's time to test the waters and find out what kind of friend she is. For me, that involves hanging out on a one-to-one basis. Conversations tend to deepen once you get past the small talk and you find out what the other person actually thinks about his boss, spouse, and even political and religious views. Take the Initiative You need to make the first step, not wait on the other person. People get busy with life and may not make fri...

Last week I introduced the Friendship Funnel and how you need to continually meet, filter, and invest in people to make new friends. In this article, let's focus on the "meet" part of the equation – how do you intentionally encounter new groups of people? Top 4 Places for Finding Friends There are a ton of situations and gatherings where you can meet new people, but the groups where I've had the most success had these things in common: An area of interest for you Regularly occurring meetings that happen at least once a month (or are supplemented with active social media channels, chatrooms, or forums) Growing membership with both new and longtime participants Here are a few examples of where I have personally found and made friends despite not knowing anyone: Church Churches encourage fellowship, community, and love for your fellow man, so usually members have a culture of being very open to making new friends. (If not, try another church.) Upon find...

There's an art to making friends as an adult. Many studies and articles have been written about how easy it is to make friends in school because you're in constant proximity, but as adults we get busy with life – work, travel, the kids' soccer games, family commitments, etc. Our social circle (I'm talking about real friends, not social media followers) get smaller and smaller, and before you know it, your life has somehow become more isolated and, well, boring. Starting from Square One When Mr. Gamer and I moved to another state to be closer to family, I was suddenly dropped into a world where I worked from home and knew no one except my husband and parents-in-law. Video chats with my old friends back home weren't cutting it; I was painfully lonely and desperate to meet new people. Over the course of three years, I developed a systematic method for finding and making friends when you're starting from zero. Obviously, this technique may not be for ever...